If the demon is not satiated then it punishes you with withdrawal symptoms as a result of all the stimulation your body receives from your addictive pattern. The neutral level of your nervous system becomes raised in order to compensate for the heightened state of neurotransmitters being released within your body so that when your body is without, it lies at a state below the neutral level and symptoms that are the opposite of the stimulation, or withdrawal, arise.
The solution to this devil inside of you seems simple, but the truth is that it will never go away. It will tempt you with its pleasures, trick you with your own thoughts and manipulate you with your own brain chemistry for as long as you live. But all you have to do is reject it; absolutely refuse to feed its humongous appetite. It’s too late, though it may shrivel and weaken inside you, it will never go away. This behaviour can never be unlearned; it will always be there with you in the background waiting for an opportune moment to strike. Shut down all pathways towards it and it will lie in a dormant state for as long as you live.
You enter an endless cycle of quitting and relapse. You quit for a short period of time but it convinces you to relapse. It is so crafty that it appears that you convince yourself to relapse. The crafty devil gets craftier the more you resist. Though you've been actively resisting for years, it is still there in all its hideous glory stalking each moment of your life. Shame grows within you that you have allowed this demon to persist and influence your life so profoundly. You vow that this is truly the end.
But it’s not. The cycle only continues. New methods are employed but your will power rises and recedes like the tides of the ocean. Every ounce of energy of your very being is harnessed to fight it, but it is in a brief moment of weakness where the demon arises to become the victor.
Your friends and family, who have always known something was wrong, are enlightened through your words of your demon. They show you their demons as well; you are not alone. Some even face the same demon as you, those who you thought were so immensely strong, yet they too cower before the shadow of your oppressor. There is support and mutual understanding, and this only further increases your strength. But still it takes a momentary lapse of attention, and the devil has deceived you.
Now you sit in absolute silence. This demon still resides, ever present having achieved omnipotence. You have grown so strong fighting this thing that while your soul wears scars from the years of all-out war, you are not the same person you were back then. Though much has been lost and some aspects of you receded as they were devoured by the demon. You accept this gracefully. You've built a paradise inside yourself, from all the books read, research conducted, meditation, prayer, laughter and so much more. While on one hand the demon ate away at you, the other searched for the truth.
The simple answer that has been there for so long approaches you in a moment of absolute clarity. Now you catch yourself as each destructive thought arises from the murky mystery of consciousness. You choose not to embellish these thoughts actively; to actively avoid immersing yourself in this activity because in the great scheme of things it is and has been so detrimental to you, your family and friends and even the world. This endless war has created a warrior in you, far from perfect but ultimately aware of all that is. You full heartedly acknowledge that it is time for this war to end, that new battles are to be fought with a clear mind and open heart.
Your victory shall pulsate from your open wounds with the effulgence of a thousand radiant suns which can be harnessed to light fires in the hearts of people around the globe. That if one person can escape the clutches of the demons within them with your story, your purpose here on this earth has been fulfilled.
But still within you, it lives…
The solution to this devil inside of you seems simple, but the truth is that it will never go away. It will tempt you with its pleasures, trick you with your own thoughts and manipulate you with your own brain chemistry for as long as you live. But all you have to do is reject it; absolutely refuse to feed its humongous appetite. It’s too late, though it may shrivel and weaken inside you, it will never go away. This behaviour can never be unlearned; it will always be there with you in the background waiting for an opportune moment to strike. Shut down all pathways towards it and it will lie in a dormant state for as long as you live.
You enter an endless cycle of quitting and relapse. You quit for a short period of time but it convinces you to relapse. It is so crafty that it appears that you convince yourself to relapse. The crafty devil gets craftier the more you resist. Though you've been actively resisting for years, it is still there in all its hideous glory stalking each moment of your life. Shame grows within you that you have allowed this demon to persist and influence your life so profoundly. You vow that this is truly the end.
But it’s not. The cycle only continues. New methods are employed but your will power rises and recedes like the tides of the ocean. Every ounce of energy of your very being is harnessed to fight it, but it is in a brief moment of weakness where the demon arises to become the victor.
Your friends and family, who have always known something was wrong, are enlightened through your words of your demon. They show you their demons as well; you are not alone. Some even face the same demon as you, those who you thought were so immensely strong, yet they too cower before the shadow of your oppressor. There is support and mutual understanding, and this only further increases your strength. But still it takes a momentary lapse of attention, and the devil has deceived you.
Now you sit in absolute silence. This demon still resides, ever present having achieved omnipotence. You have grown so strong fighting this thing that while your soul wears scars from the years of all-out war, you are not the same person you were back then. Though much has been lost and some aspects of you receded as they were devoured by the demon. You accept this gracefully. You've built a paradise inside yourself, from all the books read, research conducted, meditation, prayer, laughter and so much more. While on one hand the demon ate away at you, the other searched for the truth.
The simple answer that has been there for so long approaches you in a moment of absolute clarity. Now you catch yourself as each destructive thought arises from the murky mystery of consciousness. You choose not to embellish these thoughts actively; to actively avoid immersing yourself in this activity because in the great scheme of things it is and has been so detrimental to you, your family and friends and even the world. This endless war has created a warrior in you, far from perfect but ultimately aware of all that is. You full heartedly acknowledge that it is time for this war to end, that new battles are to be fought with a clear mind and open heart.
Your victory shall pulsate from your open wounds with the effulgence of a thousand radiant suns which can be harnessed to light fires in the hearts of people around the globe. That if one person can escape the clutches of the demons within them with your story, your purpose here on this earth has been fulfilled.
But still within you, it lives…
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